So a few years ago, I was awarded a fellowship for the year following grad school. In this position, I was able to do a lot of networking. At one particular networking event, I met a woman who was a consultant in a field I was very interested in pursuing a job in once my fellowship ended. We chatted for a while and really got along, so she invited me to come into the office for an interview. I jumped at the chance.
A week or so later, I took a day off of my fellowship (which was a difficult maneuver given that it was a limited duration to begin with) and went downtown to meet with this woman. We chatted for a few minutes about her firm…and then she asked me if I was single.
I had, in fact, very recently (like, 5 days ago) become single during a painful breakup over a difficult health situation on my partner’s end of things.
I tried to hide that I just wanted to cry over that thought she triggered and instead just said ‘uh…yeah? WHY?!’
“Oh perfect! I have JUST the guy for you!!”
I shit you not. I literally gave up a day of work for what I thought was a job interview…to be interviewed to see if I was fit to date her friend. I regained a vague sense of composure over the next few minutes and diplomatically left.
It took me a few days to get over the shock, and it was also humiliating to tell my mentor for my fellowship the following day what had happened. He was appalled and didn’t blame me at all for that experience, and just commiserated with me about how inappropriate that was.
A few days went by, and I slowly got over that incident.
An email introduction appeared.
This chick actually thought it was ok to send an email intro between me and her dude friend.
And he emailed me immediately asking to meet up.
I was furious. I calmly emailed him back and informed him of the entire situation and thanked him for his interest, but told him I was in no place to date. He was unaware of the whole story, and responded with an emphatic apology and agreed to never contact me again.
Fast forward to a few months later. I was hiking with my favorite hiking buddy up to a remote alpine lake. We were having a great time chatting and pushing our limits on a tough hike. At one point about a mile from the top, we paused to try to remember how to breathe and have a normal heartbeat again, and let a group pass. As they trickled by, a woman stopped and excitedly said my name. I jerked my head up to be met face to face with the woman who ‘interviewed’ me.
She was soooo excited to run into me. And she was with the guy she wanted me to date.
Dear life: seriously?!
I put on the fakest smile and immediately deflected. My hiking buddy, seeing that I needed rescuing, did me a solid and took over and got the woman back to passing us by on the hike.
Bitch didn’t even offer us the tequila she was chugging at the lake when we arrived.
Fast forward to a few months later. A friend was getting married in a few weeks and she set up a fun bachelorette party evening. She wasn’t someone I knew super well, but I wanted to support her for her big day—and I am not one to turn down a bachelorette party! I excitedly met her and her crew at the first destination…and stopped short the minute I walked into the bar.
Job interview girl was there. And sitting next to my friend.
Dear life: just fuck yourself.
I decided to ignore the situation and just focus on the bride to be. Because…that’s how a grown-up and a friend handles things. There was no way I was going to divert attention away from my friend for her big fun night. So I acknowledged the job interview girl and said ‘oh hi! Good to see you again! I’m so excited we can support our mutual friend on her big night!’
Instead of taking the hint, she immediately started blaring out the entire story at the top of her lungs, taking ALL attention onto herself (and by default, me).
Facepalm. And sigh.
Our poor mutual friend then felt awkward AF about us being in the same room, and started trying to patch things up. I covered for all of us and diverted attention back to her as soon as I possibly could, but I felt awful for having her night start out with such a downer of a moment. In the end, she had a fabulous night that she will remember (through all of our pictures…because we showed her a GOOD night) for the rest of her life. Also, turns out job interview girl has an early bedtime, so that helped divert awkwardness early on.
That was the last time I have run into her, but I am still wary of another possible time and the awkward possibilities it could hold.
Tho…as usual, at least it will be memorable (and I’ll be sure to update this entry).